My Love for You Islike Funny

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Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood. -Oscar Wilde

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I love you like a fat kid loves cake. -Scott Adams

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Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in. -Richard Jeni

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Love is hiding who you are at all times. It's wearing make-up to bed and going downstairs to Burger King to poop. -30 Rock

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It wasn't love at first sight. It took a full five minutes. -Lucille Ball

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Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. -Joan Crawford

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Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing. -Natasha Leggero

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Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it. -George Carlin

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I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. -Unknown

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First love is a kind of vaccination which saves man from catching the complaint the second time. -Honore de Balzac

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I love you and it's getting worse. -Joseph E. Morris

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You call it madness, but I call it love. -Don Byas

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Love thy neighbor — and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier. -Mae West

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To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. -Oscar Wilde

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Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions. -Woody Allen

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Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love -Albert Einstein

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Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties. -Jules Renard

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A pair of powerful spectacles has sometimes sufficed to cure a person in love. -Friedrich Nietzsche

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All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt. -Charles Schulz

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Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke. -Lynda Barry

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A touch of love, everyone becomes a poet. -Plato

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A youth with his first cigar makes himself sick. A youth with his first girl makes everybody sick. -Mary Wilson

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People should fall in love with their eyes closed. -Andy Warhol

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Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there. -George Burns

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Love sucks. Sometimes it feels good. Sometimes it's just another way to bleed. -Laurell K. Hamilton

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I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it? -Jean Illsley Clarke

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Love means nothing in tennis, but it's everything in life. -Author unknown

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Love, I've come to understand is more than three words mumbled before bedtime. -Nicholas Sparks

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Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. -Albert Einstein

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I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. -Rita Rudner

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Love is being stupid together. -Paul Valery

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Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species. -W. Somerset Maugham

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You can't put a price tag on love. But if you could, I'd wait for it to go on sale. -Hussein Nishah

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If loving someone is putting them in a straitjacket and kicking them down a flight of stairs, then yes, I have loved a few people -Jarod Kintz

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Love is like war, easy to begin but hard to end. -Leo Buscaglia

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What the world really needs is more love and less paper work. -Pearl Bailey

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The only thing worse than a boy who hates you: a boy that loves you. -Markus Zusak, The Book Thief

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Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. -Unknown

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No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. -Unknown

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If you love something set it free, but don't be surprised if it comes back with herpes. -Chuck Palahniuk

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I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough. -Russell Brand

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Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love. -Charlie Brown

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Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. -Franklin P. Jones

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Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess. -Lemony Snicket

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It is easier to love humanity as a whole than to love one's neighbor. -Eric Hoffer

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Love; A temporary insanity curable by marriage. -Ambrose Bierce

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People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy. -Bob Hope

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You could empty the trash and my love for you still wouldn't fit inside. But just because it won't fit, doesn't mean you shouldn't empty the trash. -Jarod Kintz

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Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner. -Jerry Seinfeld

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The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because generally they are the same people. -G.K. Chesterton

Related: The Funniest Relationship Quotes

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Only time can heal your broken heart, just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs. -Miss Piggy

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To love someone as much as you love yourself, that is the ideal. Especially if that someone is your clone. -Jarod Kintz

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Source: https://www.curatedquotes.com/love-quotes/funny/

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